标签归档:英语笑话

英语笑话又5则

1
The weather was so hot that a man wanted to mow his lawn in the nude.

He ask his wife, “Honey, what would the neighbors think?”

She replied, “Probably that I married you for your money.”

2
At a wedding, a little boy asked his mother, “Mommy, why does the girl wear white?”

She answered, “The bride wears white because this is the happiest day of her life.”

The bogy thought about this and said, “Why is the groom wearing black?”

3
A man and his wife entered the dentist’s office.

The man said, “I want a tooth pulled. We’re in a big hurry, so forget about any pain killers.”

The dentist said, “You’re very brave. Which tooth is it?”

The man said to his wife, “Show him your bad tooth, honey.”

4
A gangster wanted to corrupt a politician. He offered a fancy diamond watch in return for a favor.

The politician said, “It’s bribery. I can’t accept it.”

The gangster said, “I’ll sell you the watch for $20 dollars instead.”

The politician smiled a great big smile. He answered, “In that case, I’ll take two.”

5,这个是我最喜欢的:
Some animals are smarter than humans.

Take the intelligent dolphin as an example. After just a few weeks in captivity, it can train humans to throw it fish.

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英语笑话5则 –男女和夫妻

1
At a party, a handsome man walked over to a girl and asked, “Are you going to dance?”

She excitedly replied, “Yes!”

He excitedly said, “Great! May I have your seat?”

2
A kid asked his mom, “Is it true? My teacher said in some aboriginal areas a woman doesn’t know her husband until they marry.”

The mother sighed, “It happens in every society.”

3
A wife said this to her husband. “Honey, do you know how close I came to marrying Sam before I married you?”

He replied, “Now I know why he smiles and shakes my hand so warmly whenever we meet.”

4
A couple noticed some young people kissing passionately.

The wife said, “Why can’t you do that?”

The man replied, “Honey, I don’t know that girl yet!”

5
A man went to the police station to speak to a burglar.

He asked, “How did you get into my house without waking my wife? Tell me your secret because I’ve been trying to do that for years.”

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英语笑话5则

1.Marry Him

Sue loved Steve, but she worried about all the money he squandered when they went out together. “How can I stop Steve from spending so much money on me?” She asked her mother.

“Marry him!”

2.Flowers

“Take a bunch of flowers home for your wife, sir.” urged the street vendor.
“I haven’t got a wife,” replied the young man.
“Then buy a bunch for your sweetheart.”
“I don’t have a sweetheart, either.”
“Well then, buy a couple of bunches to celebrate your luck.”

3.Is Your Wife Home Now

The boss arrived at his office with a terrible headache. 继续阅读

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